We’ve all had those days. Days that you just can’t seem to get your head above water no matter how hard you try. Sometimes you don’t even have the to energy to try. One day a task can seem so simple, and the next it can seem impossible! We talked about feeling like a failure last week, and we decided that we will not just accept it right?! But, sometimes I just look at something that I need to get done, and instantly want to take a nap!! It’s exhausting! Unfortunately, regardless of how much else is going on, if you don’t do it, it’s likely it won’t get done. So what do you do?
Let’s start by getting honest. Really honest. Like, the not so fun type that means we address things the way they really are, not just the way that we want them to be, or choose to see them. Remember, we are focusing on balance, meaning we have to be fair to both extremes of our situation. Why are you overwhelmed by the task you are facing? Are you just suffering from lack of motivation? Is there a situation that is making it too much for you at the present moment? Maybe you aren’t a very motivated person, and even though you want a home that reflects a productive lifestyle, you just generally have a bad case of the “I-don’t-want-to’s” or “I-don’t-feel-like-it’s”. Maybe your health is an obstacle, or you truly don’t have enough time between tasks A and D to complete tasks B and C… What is the reason? Really think about it. It’s always true to an extent that we don’t have time. But could we have made the time had we really tried? Some days I just can’t muster up the motivation to be productive. And some days I want to be but physically can’t. The biggest physical obstacles for me have been when I was put on bed rest, and now migraines and dizziness. Being put on bedrest was so hard. I never fully followed that order, but I didn’t do a whole lot of cleaning either. As far as the migraines, I never would have let a headache stop me from doing what I wanted, or needed to do. That’s what I thought anyway. I generally have at least a mild headache. But I didn’t understand migraines until I started having them. And that, my friends, is a whole different ball game!!
If you truly cannot do the things that need to be done; if there is something physically keeping you from doing them, then you’re going to have to accept that. It’s so hard, I know. But you can’t continue to beat yourself up over something you have no control over. Doing that will just give you a sense of uselessness and set you up for future failure. So, if you can’t get to your to do list today, (or for two or three days) strategically divide those tasks over the days following in small pieces, so that you can slowly get caught back up. You are not superhuman, and that’s ok. Give yourself grace and move at a pace that is consistent, yet not unreasonable. Of course, if you are facing any type of extended issue, you should figure out what needs to be done in order to prevent chaos and actual dirtiness. Maybe your mom and/or mother in law could come over on certain days to help clean, or clean for you. Maybe your husband and children can agree (or do it fighting tooth and nail…) to pick up the slack while Mommy is out of commission. Maybe you need to hire some help for just a short time to keep things above water. Both times I was put on bed rest my oldest son had to do all the vacuuming for me. He was only 7 and 9, but he did a good job and it was a huge blessing to me! (Come to think of it, I might owe hime some money… lol!) Whatever you do will likely be a sacrifice in one way or another, but it’s something you will need to accept, because long term is much more important than right now. Don’t lose the war because you are stubborn about this battle!
Then we have the flip side of that coin. You might realize that you are perfectly capable of doing what you should be, but your not doing it… then guess what, it’s time to put your big girl britches on, and get to it! The longer you stair at it and wish it didn’t exist, the worse it’s going to get! And it’s likely that no little fairy is going to show up while you are sleeping and do it for you!! I know it can be extremely overwhelming. At times it really does make me want to nap! But, alas, when I wake up, it’s still there. And it’s not going anywhere unless I take care of it myself. My advice is to grab a piece of paper and a pen, and write down everything that needs done. Then just do one of those things. When you’re done with that, you guessed it, pick another one! For some people it’s best to knock out the little things first. If you are struggling with motivation, that would probably be the way I would tell you to go. Seeing those little accomplishments will help to make you feel motivated, and when the mess has been making your head spin, those clean areas will help you to be able to think straight! If the problem is more overwhelm, lack of time, or anything along those lines, I’d recommend going with the larger tasks first. Again you will gain a sense of accomplishment, but you will also be left with smaller tasks to catch up on if you don’t get it all done in your allotted cleaning time. Decide what will work best for you, and… go!
I don’t think there will ever be a day that I sit down in the evening and think “Wow, I did absolutely everything that I needed to do today.” If I have days like that they are few and far between. But I hate trying to sit down in the evening, and twitching about my house being a mess, knowing that I’ve got to go to bed soon and I will be very stressed if it’s still that way in the morning. This doesn’t make for a good night’s rest, and sets me up for another stressed day. Often times it actually means that I will speed through as much of it as possible after everyone else goes to bed. And then crash. So I prefer to get things done in a timely fashion so that whatever isn’t done when I’m ready to “clock out” (Yeah right…!) can be written down for tomorrow, and released from my brain. Cluttered brain Mommy just doesn’t seem to give the best snuggles and night night kisses…!
I promise you I do understand the desire to be productive and just not being able to muster it up. I really do. Just get yourself to start. Start somewhere. Anywhere. Give yourself grace until you can get into a good routine, but do not give up! Remember, anything you do is better than having done nothing. So Momma’s, lets try to put our productive pants on and see if we can create a less stressed tomorrow!!
Smile through the trials!